Wow! I forgot how easy it is to create a NEW post! You simply TYPE as you transcribe at least ONE of the voices in your head! It's THAT easy!
Okay. I've calmed down a bit. I thought I'd interrupt my "regular" schedule of "Resolutions for Others" to make a SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
I'm all riled up again! Sorry! Please forgive me, assuming you can search somewhere in those cold black hearts of yours to locate that gesture! Sorry again! That was totally uncalled for in the majority of cases!
Okay. Without further ado, I would like to announce ...
THE FIRST ANNUAL PUGLYPALOOSA!!!
That's right! My VERY OWN festival!
Let's take some of the inevitable questions in advance:
"Will human sacrifice be involved? Because I have a list handy." - GirlGoyle a.k.a. Ed
"Won't this just be a cheesy recreation of 'Lambypaloosa'? Been there, done that. No pullin' the wool over these eyes a second time. BTW, I need my skirt back." - Jin
"Can I go topless in the crowd? Otherwise I may have other obligations." - Serena
"I see you have finally sold out. I KNEW this would happen with liberals now in charge." - Sparring K9
"The current Canadian-to-U.S. dollar exchange rate is 1.2578 : 1. If you're going to do this please hurry so I can attend." - /t.
"This may just be the ticket to me visiting your stupid blog again. Will it be good for once? Will there be booze? Please answer the 2nd question first." - Party Girl
"Not if there's nudity." - Pud
"Will it be tasteful and embrace everyone in the spirit of friendship and tolerance? Also, will there be a Nachos Tent?" - Dianne
"Is there any possibility that it will consist of huge crowds with people packed like sardines; sandals and mopeds serving as the only sources of transportation? Plus will it smell of squid? I like to feel at home. Plus, any chance of fisticuffs? It's been a while ..." - NYD
"Your festival sucks. I will NOT be attending. Oh wait. This is supposed to be a question. Unlike some of the other dumbasses, I shall comply. Okay here goes: will anyone at the festival NOT be gay?" - Mighty Dyckerson
"As I write this, I am unsure of what /t.'s question will be. But I am certain it will have me LOL at /t." - Enemy
"ANYTHING to escape this LIVING ABSOLUTE HELLHOLE of a small town I am trapped in. Even it's your LIVING ABSOLUTE HELLHOLE of a festival. As long as it's not taking place here in the same LIVING ABSOLUTE HELLHOLE of a small town I am trapped in. It IS, isn't it? I KNEW it. F*ck." - Sassy
"I've never been to one of these things. There is a prayer service and a collection for the homeless, right?" - Lamby
"If it's a cross between "Burning Man" and "The Lottery", count me in." - Boneman
"Will I have unrestricted access as "Official Photographer"? I don't want to lead you on, but there is always the chance I could become the Linda Eastman to your Paul McCartney." - Foam
"I have extra curtain fabric from my kids' "basement oasis" project. I can provide the curtains to hide the shame of the rampant fornication that's sure to take place from the opening act onwards." - Helene a.k.a. Kate
"Sex AND drugs AND Rock'n'Roll? I am SO there!" - Leelee
"Don't have public showers where men can bathe together. Trust me on this." - Cathy
"Sex at your event is one thing I haven't crossed off of my list! See you there!" - RevRee
"I've heard that your event will make the film "Midnight Express" seem like the Disney version of a Turkish prison, only with poorer quality hashish." - Bespelled
"Your blog may have "jumped the shark" with this promotion. Unless you actually have a "Pug Jumps the Shark" event. Then it would be SO cool!" - Anonymous from California
I will field more of your questions in the comments section (pics to be added BTW). I hope to see all of you real soon at THE FIRST ANNUAL PUGLYPALOOSA!!!
By Your Side...
17 hours ago