While walking through the woods a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing?"
"I'm listening to the music of the tree," the other man replied.
"You gotta be kiddin' me."
"No, would you like to give it a try?"
Understandably curious, the man says, "Well, OK..." So he wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this the other guy, slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree, stark naked, and asked, "What the hell happened to you?"
He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there.
When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said, "Man, this just ain't gonna be your day cupcake..."
.
269 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 269 of 269K9 - As long as it's not "pug the crapper", I'm fine with it.
Girlgoyle, as you can see, I am still being held hostage in my own comments section. Send help!
Jmeped, for YOU I'll do it. If for no other reason than out of sheer relief that you're still alive. BTW, check out my previous post for a treat.
I will need to see a shot of you in the shirt.
/t. - Well THAT won't do at all. All I now see is nose. Okay, the moustache can stay.
/t. - Very Gala indeed.
GG, that cooper dude is starting to creep me out, BTW. Beware. Let me know that you saw this. Thx.
puerileuwaitefhsurye, Thank you for the posts. Not to stroke your already huge ago, but you're a damn good writer.
On a side note, I feel like shit today, thanks again for the damn cold!
Sorry, Rev. Apparently there's a new song out that says I've gotta be cruel to be kind.
The good news? MY cold is almost gone.
The bad news? My shoulder hurts like a mo-fo.
Get well soon.
puerileuwaiteferiwythf, I'm high on dayquil and at work... I need to see you in my office
GG, agreed. Anyone has the right to comment. Heck, MY blog is evidence of that! And I'm grateful for it. Finally, my dementia has found an audience. Why, it's just like that "Message in a Bottle" song!
It's just that I got a really weird vibe, especially after his last 2-comments. Laying it on just a tad too thick (Not that I'VE ever been known to bullshit.). I despise phonies. Call me the Holden Caulfield on the blog world (I've been called worse. Especially by THIS crew.). So my radar is sensitive to the possibility of hidden agendas. I DO realize how incredibly intelligent and perceptive you are, so you're probably way ahead of me in noticing. And here I am pointing out the obvious. I just want to make DAMNED sure to look out for my "peeps". Thanks. Father Hen out.
Rev, you must be high. I never get called into the office when the boss is sober. Unless I'm being fired. Wait! Is THAT it? I'm fired!?! Well screw you then! I don't need this damned job anyway!
Unless it's for some "affirmative action", babe. In that case I am SO there.
puerileuwaiterteiruys, what are you talking about? of course I'm HIGH! I'm HIGH AS A FREAKIN' KITE!
Now, about that "affirmative action", we need to discuee, in my office about how we can better communicate on a more.... personal level...
did I say personal? ha ha ha I meant professional!
Professional is good. They don't call it PRO-creating for nothin'.
BTW, as of RIGHT NOW you and Mighty D are tied at 41 each. Do your comments on your own blogs count?
Of course they count! Everything I say counts!
I'm a pro at Pro creating... although I've never created, I'm still a pro!
It's very close right now. Rev is winning though.
Rev, I had a feeling that you were.
Lamby, thanks for the update.
GG, alrighty then. I can go back to doing what I do best: being a goofball.
I'm dying...come on- pleassseeeee- I'm begging you---Bi-Polar bears, Noodle Canoodle...another DUMB joke...anything but this.
FM, so ... my jokes are ... DUMB? How humiliating! I ... don't know ... if ... I ... can go on ...
what's that chick's problem?
If you can't go on, I'm changing my blog.
It's me. I'm EVERY chick's problem! FM is just razzing me. But she IS right. New post by tommorow mid-day at the latest. Honest!
Lamby, you already know my policy on changes to your blog. It's bigger than both of us now. With all of your help, I CAN go on.
It's not bigger than me, pug. I can go on with a new blog. I'll leave it the way it is for now. Just watch your step, or I will change it.
/t. - You get to have your image on a massive billboard cheerfully endorsing my blog. This is one fish that you may want to throw back.
Lamby, I am totally digging your feistiness! But you're still terminally cute.
With comments like that you may stay on my good side. YOU MAY!!!! Time will tell.
/t. - I'll throw in a wristwatch designed by Senor Dali. I think you know the one.
I'm still waiting for a pic of your hands, making suggestive gestures...
P may have to start a chat room, so the fun can go on..IN REAL TIME...
Rev, stay tuned. I may have something for you soon.
/t. - I'm sorry already ...
GG, I'll have new a post shortly. Oh, the pressure!
"We shall serve no whiners before it's time.:
- Orson Welles
Leelee, a chat room would be the final nail in the coffin for the hope of having a life someday. No thanks!
You're going to send Rev something and not me? That makes me very sad.
Lamby, all you need to do is ask. Rev simply wanted to see my hands. That request is easy to accomodate. So what can I do for you?
I'm asking to see a picture of you.
Lamby - That's easy. You already have one. I'm the "Worker Bee" in the "Finding the Right Employee" post. Enjoy!
Lambo, I'll send you a picture of my nut sack if you'd like...
Proving that blogger sux pubes. I've been stopping by faithfully for the past several days to see whatchya been up to. I saw no new posts. I sat down tonight to send a comment asking, "Hey, where's you at?" and what should I find? Several posts that I have missed out on that weren't there when I checked today.
...269 comments and not a single one from me. How have you survived?
Sucky blogger. Sorry, honey. I swear I've been checking.
PG, I notice that sometimes too. I use multiple computers and operating systems (Apple OS X 10.4, Windows XP, and even Windows 2000 Professional). My Windows (running the latest versions of Internet Explorer) browsers tend to misbehave, not always showing the latest version of a webpage, even though I have my preferences set that way. So beware. (You called me "honey"!)
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